Gone But Not Forgotten
by Paige Terner
Summary: Rick goes to visit a lost loved one. One-shot.


******Disclaimer: I don't own most of the characters I write about. If you recognize a name, odds are it isn't mine. But seeing as this is a fanfic website, you probably knew that already.**

**Thanks again to Sunshiny-Kate, the best beta a writer could ask for****!**

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Rick knelt down and brushed away a few brown leaves that had gathered at the base of the elegantly carved stone. He laid a bouquet of vibrant flowers in their place and stood up. The cold was licking at him so he pulled his coat tighter and shoved his hands in his pockets. For several minutes he just stared at the letters forever stored in the pale gray marble.

"Hey." He finally spoke into the emptiness surrounding him. "Another year has come and gone, so here I am to bring you up to speed on everything that has happened."

He sighed and looked up, taking in the city on the horizon.

"You know, New York seems harsher somehow, without you in it. Like you made it better, made it run smoother or something." He shrugged. "Maybe it's just that you lit up the darkness enough that I didn't see as much of it."

He brought his troubled blue eyes back to the tombstone.

"Alexis and David are doing well. Their first anniversary was two months ago. I know I told you last year about the wedding. I still wish you could have been there, and I know she does too. They stay pretty busy, but they told me to tell you hello, and that they'd stop by as soon as they could." He smiled in spite of himself as a swell of pride hit him. "David got a job at a new school, and Alexis graduated from medical school in May. She is doing her pathology residency now. She hopes to end up working for the NYPD. Which makes me happy because Lanie could keep an extra eye on her for me." He toed the ground. I don't go to the precinct anymore."

He took a hand from a pocket and brushed back a lock of hair that had fallen in front of his eyes. He needed a trim, but he'd been busy lately too. His hand slipped back into the warmth of his pocket before he continued.

"We caught him. The man behind the curtain, so to say. It took us long enough, but we finally did it. He orchestrated everything from covering up Armen's murder to..." He sighed again. "It doesn't matter what all he had a hand in. He's done. I don't want to talk about him anymore. You probably want to know, but you'll just have to let me have this one."

Tears brimmed at his lower eyelids, threatening to spill over.

"Adlyn is doing well." One tear escaped. "I wish you could have met her, held her, seen her." Another tear fell. "She is so beautiful. Takes after her mother that way." He couldn't hold the rest of the tears back any longer. A sob flew from his throat and he found himself glad that he was alone. "She would have loved you so much, and I hate it for her that she'll never have you in her life. You would have loved her too."

More tears fell, dripping faster than the first wave onto his coat. He used his shoulder to wipe a few away from his chin before continuing.

"She has my eyes and my sense of humor, but in nearly every other aspect she is her mother's daughter." He sniffled. "She's the youngest in her preschool class, but she is the leader of the pack. She looks after the kids that get picked on. She's like a little crusader for justice, while all the other kids just think about snacks and their ABC's." Another sob tore from his lips, this one accompanied by a pained laugh. "Three years old, and she's smart as a whip. She is already starting to read, and she loves to draw."

He sucked in a shaky breath and lifted a hand again, this time to wipe away some more of the tears. He blinked several times to try to further stem their flow, but it was a losing battle.

"I miss you so much." He sighed out on the breath he'd still been holding. "I really do. And I love you. I didn't say that nearly enough when it mattered, when you could hear it. I'm sorry for that. But I hope you know how much I truly did love you. How much I still do."

He sniffled again, and looked up at the sky. It was bluer than the eyes of both his daughters and was nearly devoid of clouds. He closed his still teary eyes and let the sun warm his wind chilled face.

"Oh!" He exclaimed suddenly and looked back at the grave marker. "I can't believe I nearly forgot to tell you this. Kate-"

"Daddy!"

The silence splitting, high pitched squeal had Rick looking around in a desperate panic for his daughter. He turned to his right, where the scream had come from and saw her, her arms spread wide as she bolted towards him. He relaxed instantly as he saw Kate trotting several feet behind her, looking slightly out of breath.

"Sorry, Rick." She called out, definitely with a hint of a pant to her tired voice. "She saw you and got excited. I couldn't grab her in time."

Before he could answer, Adlyn was upon him and he knelt down to wrap her in his arms. He stood back up, blowing raspberries onto the soft skin of her neck as he did so. She writhed in his grip, giggling vigorously and incessantly. When he stopped, she threw her little arms around his neck and sighed with relief into his shoulder.

"Daddy, I gots bowed in the car."

"You got bored?" He reached up and ran his fingers gently through her wild hair, it's wavy brown strands tangled slightly from her run.

"Yes." She sat up, placing her hands on his chest for support. "So we gots out to go for a walk."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah. And when we walked awound that giant bush, I saw you."

"Then you ran over here, right?"

"Yep." She smiled proudly. "And after that you hugged me and spit on my neck."

"I remember that part." Rick smiled. "And I'm so happy to see you. But you shouldn't have run away from Mommy."

"I sorry, Daddy. Mommy is slow."

Rick swallowed the laugh that nearly burst from his mouth.

"Mommy isn't slow, baby. She's pregnant."

"Oh yeah. She's pwegnant. That means my little bwother is inside her."

"That's right." Castle chuckled. "Now, what do you need to say to Mommy?"

Adlyn turned her head and saw that Kate had almost reached them. She glanced back at Rick and he nodded at her, so she looked back at Kate.

"Mommy?"

"Yes, Addy?"

"I sorry I wan fwom you because you awe pwegnant."

Kate cut her eyes over to Rick, so he smiled and shook his head, telling her silently that he would explain later.

"Thank you for being sorry, sweetheart." Kate stepped closer and kissed her on the forehead. "It's not good to run off like that."

"Okay." Adlyn laid her head back on Rick's shoulder and yawned.

Kate smiled and rubbed a hand down her daughter's back. Then she reached up with her other hand and cupped Rick's cheek. He leaned into her touch and she used her thumb to wipe away a few remnants of moisture from under his eye. He turned his head and kissed her palm, then leaned down and pressed his lips to hers. She ran her hand over his shoulder and down his arm until her fingers were intertwined with his before pulling away.

"I'm sorry we interrupted you." She said quietly.

"Don't worry about it." He smiled. "I was almost done anyway." He briefly touched her protruding belly with thier joined hands and smiled. "I was just about to tell her about this. But now she can see for herself, so she knows all the news." He looked at Adlyn, whose eyes were now closed. "Besides, I think we should get this one home."

"She was rubbing her eyes in the car." Kate told him. "That's actually why I got her out. I didn't want her to fall asleep yet, because she would have woken up when you came back."

"Thank you." He kissed her again, light and quick, then smiled down at her.

"For what?"

"Letting me have the alone time."

"Of course." She smiled.

He shifted Adlyn slightly, getting her higher on his hip so she'd be easier to carry, and she opened her eyes. She grinned sleepily at him, and just like that, the last of his sorrow was gone.

"Hey there, my little Fritter." He whispered. "You ready to go home?"

"Okay." She blinked a few times like she was trying to rid herself of the drowsiness that was taking her over. "What is a fwitter again, Daddy?"

"It's a pastry."

"A pastwy? Like a bear claw?"

"It's a little bit like a bear claw."

"I love bear claws." She lifted her head. "Can we go get some?

"May we." Rick corrected.

She groaned exaggeratedly and squinted at him, and both he and Kate had to fight to hide their smiles.

"May we daddy?" She finally relented. "Please?"

He threw a quick glance at Kate, and she nodded curtly, telling him she didn't care either way.

"Yes, baby." He answered. "We'll get some bear claws on the way home. But you have to promise to take a nap when we get home before you get to eat one."

"Can I has just one bite befowe home?" Adlyn pleaded with her baby blues, widening them to show how much she wanted him to say yes.

"One bite."

"How bout two?" She bit her lip, something she usually did when she was being conniving.

"One or none." He replied. "Your choice."

"I choose one." She said quickly.

"Good girl." He kissed her forehead again.

She started to lay her head back down, satisifed with the results of her inquiry, but stopped halfway and looked at Kate.

"How many bites does Mommy get?"

Kate's hand was still tangled up in his, so he squeezed lovingly.

"She gets as many bites as she wants, sweetheart."

"Because she's pwegnant?"

Rick and Kate both laughed at that.

"Sure, we'll go with that." He told Adlyn.

Kate smacked him lightly on the chest, but her lips were upturned in amusement. He looked over his shoulder at the flowers he'd laid by the stone and sighed.

"Bye, Mom." He whispered. "See you next year."

"Who awe you talking to, Daddy?" Adlyn looked at the grave with her tiny eyebrows raised.

"Your Grams."

"Gwams is in that wock?"

"No, baby." Kate answered for Rick. "But this is where we come to help remember her."

"Oh." Adlyn sighed and put her head down. "I don't wemember her."

"You've never met her, Fritter." Rick explained. "But do you remember the stories I've told you about her?"

"Yeah. You told me she was dwamatic."

"Something like that, Addy." He chuckled and started walking towards the car, still hand in hand with Kate. "Something like that."


End file.
